Christmas Trees

As part of my last duty with Scouts, I’m on the 7am shift tomorrow morning to sell Christmas trees in Central Park. This is a duty done by the committee, families and leaders so I have been flogging pines for 10 years.

When I was on the committee, part of my job was PR and advertising, (I’ve just handed that over to my gorgeous friend Penny).  I sent out a media release promoting our delivery and pick up service and actually got an interview from the local paper. I mentioned how convenient it was that “once those trees have gone all dry and crispy and start dropping needles all over the lounge room carpet, we’ll pop back and collect it.” I did expect that would be the quote that they ran with…but it was.

Our ordering ‘system’ (I use that term loosely) was an old mobile phone with a dedicated number and who ever drew the short straw was in charge of manning it (ie me). So one memorable festive season, the phone was on my desk and I was, as usual, neck deep in my paid job. That bloody phone kept ringing. I’d answer calls and jot down details on the back of Power Point presentations, random post-it notes, the edge of a research report – whatever was to hand (I’d love to say it was because I was so busy, but in truth, it’s my MO). I was driving my colleagues crazy.

“MWW!!” cried my teammate Georgie as I staggered back from yet another grueling meeting. ”That fecking Christmas tree phone has not stopped ringing since you walk away!!”

“Really?” I asked, pretending to care, my mind swimming with the complexities of yet another round of unexplained rejected work.

Determined as always to make sure I didn’t lose it, Georgie slapped a Sprirex pad on my desk. “At least write them all down in the one place,” she insisted, pointedly looking at the scribbled notes on any available blank space.  As I returned calls to nuns for extra large trees for churches, librarians for their foyers and crazy women who need their tree to be “perfectly shaped, seven feet eight inches – I’ve measured the area, we have very high ceilings - delivered to Toorak at precisely 10.12am next Saturday – oh, and could you set up please” I saw the wisdom of Georgie’s ways.

I can’t even guess how many trees I’ve unloaded off trucks, (one year while 8.5 months pregnant), how many banners I’ve strung up and pulled down (my knot tying it still very dodgy), how many lattes we’ve shared, how much fast talking I’ve done of the freshness, the quality, the appeal of the fragrance, how that flat bit will fall back out, blah, blah, blah.

And am I sad to be letting all this go? NO I AM NOT!!!!!

However, if I can interest you in a very rewarding voluntary position working with youth, drop me a line.