The Kitchen Table

We're still getting rid of things post the renovation. Some of the delay has been caused by a lack of access. In packing up to commence demolition, large items were placed, Tetris-style, into the shed.  with smaller crates packed into the gaps. It's taken months to get our two large mirrors back on the wall as they were trapped behind an enormous mahogany writing desk and blocked from the side by an antique blackwood pew.

The desk has since found a happy home in Canberra, the pew has been reinstated inside and the mirrors, finally, have been hung. At last, I could get to the kitchen table so I could take a few snaps and get it on eBay. (You might recall the win I had with our new dining table).

We've had the table for over 25 years. We had it made from recycled Oregon and over the years, changed the colour of the stain, had it widened, a drawer added, as well as changed the legs from turned to tapered. It had served us well, but it was time to go.

Pricing on eBay is tricky and you need to take care not to confuse emotional connection with commercial reality. The table was solid timber and we'd had many happy times around it - kids' birthdays, dinner parties, Christmases - but no-one on eBay cares about that - they want a bargain! Nor is there a short supply - so it had to be priced to sell.

I popped it on for a seven-day auction starting at $100, which on expiring, I was offered $50 from a woman in a nearby suburb who could collect it - immediately - SOLD! And here's where the hilarity began...

The buyer arrived with roof racks to which was attached a bike fitting.  She had some vague idea that the table could just sit next to bike rack.... yeah, no. This is a very large, heavy, solid timber table - that hasn't got removable legs.

She eventually managed to get the bike attachment off and it took her, the girls and me to get it onto the rack. I asked if she had ropes and she assured me she did, pulling out three occy straps!! (Occy straps, short for octopus straps, are those lengths of cloth-covered of elastic with a hook on each end - notorious for flinging off or snapping at inopportune moments.) She wrapped one around a leg and hooked it to the roof rack, after which we left her to do the other two. She did assure me she was going to drive slowly, but I could just picture her braking at a red light and the table sliding forward, down her windscreen and onto her bonnet. The whole thing seemed highly precarious and frankly, dangerous!

Anyway, I had my $50 and the table was out of the shed, so frankly, not my problem!!! (Although of course, I do hope no-one was hurt!)

The Table

Without boring you further with the renovation, it has actually progressed pretty well.

Like all such projects, you suddenly realise the furniture you had is no longer right - and the expense rolls on.

I'd already chosen some lovely, dark green velvet dining chairs. In fact, Elle found them and they're very comfortable, so I got them. Gotta love a dining chair that invites those at the table to settle in and linger.

What I then struggled with, was a table. I wanted something that was:

•  Small enough to fit the space under the window for every day
•  Extendable for dinners of eight or more
•  Oval, in case I need to squeeze a few more around
• Able to accommodate the height of the already purchased velvet chairs (tricky with the mechanics of extension tables I discovered)
• Of a finish and design that will fit in with my eclectic taste, including almost-black floors

That last point was especially tricky as it will on occasion be positioned in the middle of the room in front of what I like to grandly refer to as 'the library,' and what the kids prefer to refer to as 'the bookshelf'. Cruel.

I nearly wore Google out trying to find one. I'm now of the opinion that unless I love it and it's perfect, I'll keep looking. But nothing fitted the bill. 

I saw this table in a magazine and whilst not perfect, (not crazy for the base) thought it warranted a call to get a price. Perhaps I could grow to love it.

When I rang and asked 'how much?', the friendly guy with the heavy Italian accent starting telling me how amazing and famous the European designer is, how exquisite his work, how fine the materials of porcelain and steel and the expertise of the craftsmanship. I was compelled to point out that the more he talked, the more expensive it was sounding - and I wasn't wrong - it was a hair under $14k. Yeah...no.

So on the search went - this time including eBay. 

And there it was - my perfect table - up for auction, in Melbourne, no bids, a couple of 'watchers' and a starting price of $35. I was so nervous I couldn't wait until the last minute, so placed a 'proxy bid' of $152 (in case someone bid $150). As it happened, no-one else placed a bid so it was mine - for $35!!

In a stroke of karma, about 2 hours after the successful purchase of the table, someone purchased the hideous Indian silk painting I'd had on eBay for months.... for exactly $35!

A few days later, we hired a trailer from Bunnings. That expedited the moving of the wine fridge from storage into the laundry, some cupboards from the shed back to the storage unit and after that, the collection of the table. The guy was lovely - I almost felt guilty taking the beautiful table for $35 - but I did it anyway!!

When we turned it upside down to glue carpet on the feet, I noticed an old black ink stamp, 'Preston Furniture' and an address. Googling it, the manufacturer had gone but it is still an industrial area so it appears that our table was made locally, I'm guessing in the 1960s. This was just getting better and better.

And look! Isn't it perfect?!! Next mission; leather couches.

The Entrepreneur

Remember the window guy who got me blushing like a teenage girl?

Turned out that looking good was his best asset. We constructed the building according to 'Angelo's' advice, but when he came back and looked he said no, they couldn't work with that. Geoff (my partner and the builder) declared him a 'nuff nuff', assured me he had no idea about building and our search for a new window guy put us back about four months :(

After a couple of quotes and meetings we now have a guy - perhaps not a model - but who certainly knows what he's talking about.

So it was with some surprise last week that I opened an email Geoff had forwarded me from   'Angelo' (yes, I did change his name to protect the guilty!) with an unrequested quote. It was now at least 4 months since he'd said he couldn't help, and now he had great pleasure in submitting plans and a quote for.... drum roll..... $70,000!!! Laugh!! (Only because we're sorted, I confess, otherwise I may have wept.)

This wasn't just out of the ballpark of what he'd originally estimated, it wasn't even in the same galaxy! We'd have to put one of the kids on eBay for that. Ridiculous!

I emailed Geoff back suggesting he'd enjoy declining that one. He did, politely. And we assumed that was the end of it, but hell no! Here's what he got back!!

Thank you for you [sic] time in this matter and look forward to a day we can do business.

On another note, i also market a travel club, our product is called 'x' 

(I've removed it - I can't take on that kind of responsibility!)

We customise amazing holiday packages at a wholesale price

Price Pledge - 100% best price on the market or you go for free!

(Website link also removed - message me if you really, really want it!!)

I would love to know your opinion about our club, once again thank you for your time.

All I can say is I hope his knowledge of travel exceeds his knowledge of building....

Oh Yeah Baby....

Seriously, the topic of lice goes on as long as... well, as long as we continue to be infested with lice. I hope you're not bored yet, but this is a ripper.

You might recall from earlier posts that I did some research and discovered heat is the enemy of the nit and its egg. It was subsequently discussed by all and sundry in the neighbourhood.

Next thing, Geoff is telling me he can buy a device on eBay that will kill all the lice in half an hour while Sass just watches TV (or I watch TV - depending who's infested I guess) - for just $50. What?

So after the usual back and forth of me saying we need more junk around here like a moose needs a hat rack and Geoff saying why don't we give it a go, I acquiesced and the devise was purchased.

And looked what turned up? I know retro is in and this is a very stylish carry case, but the hairdryer inside - hilarious!

My mum, who's not one to reveal her age (she's a couple of footy seasons off 80) had one of these when I was growing up in a small country town. People, this appliance personified sophistication, modern technology and city chic in a single, small(ish). white zip-up case. Wow. It was a sight to behold. I was actually quite proud when friends were over and mum was zipping around from power point to power point with her head stuck in that flowery cap and the blower slung casually over her shoulder, banging on her hip. Kind of like those cool bike couriers you see around the city with their Crumpler bags.... yeah, maybe not like that!

She stuck it on my head a couple of times, but it was hot and uncomfortable.

So - back from 1972  - and here we are in 2013. Geoff sent me this pic of Sass while I was in Thailand for work (that didn't happen in the 70s I can assure you - but neither were there 7 year-olds surfing the net on their laptops).

When I got back from 16-lice-free days in Thailand, I reckon it was barely hours before I was scratching again. Ahhhh! So desperate was I that I actually dragged out the Ronson and slapped it on my head for a good 45 minutes. (I used to laugh that my mother always said a good 45 minutes - surely 45 minutes is just 45 minutes? I am becoming my mother....) It was as hot and uncomfortable as I rememebered it way back in 1972. But guess what? It didn't work! That's right.... after all that discomfort, I was still scratching. I think the bugs probably just enjoyed the little steam room spa treament.