Sunday 20 February 2011

Gary

We inherited Gary from the people over the road when they moved overseas. His name was Puss then and it’s a wonder he’d come and join us given my partner used to throw water over him when he’d sit at our front door and yowl at 2am just to check we were awake.

I wanted to call him Graeme but I couldn’t sell that to the kids. Gary is Sponge Bob Square Pants’ pet snail who meows – so we settled on that.

I’m putting out there right now – Gary is a slut. There isn’t an open for inspection in the street where you can’t find him stretched out on the display furniture waiting for all the neighbours to ask pertinently “Who’s is that cat!?’ before they bang on about how much he hangs out at their place. I don’t own up.

But it came to a bit of a head late last year when we hadn’t seen him for weeks because he’d pretty much moved in with the elderly lady down the road. We don’t let him sleep inside and okay, with the chaos at our place it’s hardly conducive to a napping lap cat. However, he is our cat, so we asked if they could please stop feeding him and letting him sleep in their constantly 24 degrees-warm house.

A couple of weeks later, and still no sign of Gary, but one of the elderly lady's sons knocks on the door. The cat has a sore foot and needs to go to the vet. Tempted though I was to suggest they take it to the vet and have the bill as well, for once, I showed restraint.

I asked the vets advise. Tricky, he said. Either give them the cat or put up with it. Gary has character, we like him. He sits on the letterbox when he hears my car so he can ‘surf’ as I swing open the gate. He’s our cat god damn it!!

I had planned to post a photo of him – he’s big and orange – but naturally, I can’t find him.

So, thoughts? Here are some options as I see it:
 A. Let it go. He clearly hates you all.
       B. Put your foot down and claim him back. You’re paying the bills.
 C. Suck it up. Pay the bills – after all you do work!! Think of the joy he’s brings others.
 D. Fix the problem. Have him put down.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do your kids love him? If not, I would offer to give him to the lady who he really lives with and she can take over food and bills from now on! A purr-fect solution!

Anonymous said...

Offer him up to Nixon.

Mother Who Works said...

Ha ha ha!! I'm a little hamstrung as I've seen him about three times this year....

Anonymous said...

Unless you have a close policeman friend who can lend you a midgets ankle bracelet, i think you can only go for Option E. Pay the bills, give him loads of cuddles and let him sleep on your bed. Think of it like an investment.. Gary is like a hot water blanket - he won't last forever, but he will keep the bed warm on those icey nights.
- Hurt Anagram

Mother Who Works said...

Hello Hurt, guess who showed up this morning at 6am when I was driving one of the kids to swimming - Gary!!! The small fry showered him with cuddles, gave him some food and decided to wrap up the reunion with a game of..... chasey. I'm hedging he won't be back again until the trauma has faded from his memory!!

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